I would like to speak to the governing body that decides what "fortunes" go into fortune cookies. Some of the stuff aren't even fortunes but read more like general descriptions of personalities, behaviors or habits. If I was leading that committee, I would go all out and really give you something exciting that'll make you say either," No frickin' way!" or "Crap, thats gonna suck!" None of this bland stuff like "People around you find you affable." No way, not on my watch; its gonna be more like "People around you are gonna kill you after they discover that you will, unwittingly and single-handedly, destroy the entire penguin population during your trip to Antartica precluding any chance of making the "March of the Penguins" sequel." Now thats fortune tellin'!